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In this episode, Georgie and I focus on first-time conversations with someone when a specific context has been layed out. These types of chats often happen when you’ve been directly introduced to someone or have met someone because you are each representing organisations with a specific objective in mind. We still label these conversations as forming because there is an opportunity to build a relationship with the other person, but sometimes the context takes centre stage and you forget to explore other ways to connect meaningfully with them.
Georgie and I try out 3 different ways of having the conversation with context:
- First, I dive directly into the reason for us meeting and bypass any exploratory conversation
- Second, we create space at the beginning of the discussion for exploration before shifting gears to the intended context
- Third, we meander our way through the discussion and touch on the initial context for the conversation at a high level, but there’s no abrupt transition from the exploratory portion of the conversation to the planned focus
- Like last time, we talk about what we noticed in the dialog after each example. We highlight the pros and cons of each strategy and how it might influence outcomes.
SHOW NOTES
- First conversation example, diving directly into the context [2:34]
- First conversation analysis start [6:47]
- How it feels to be directed through a conversation [7:17]
- What happens when there’s not enough context or understanding of motivation [7:43]
- Importance of building rapport [8:34]
- Transferrable trust from the introduction will only get you so far [9:28]
- Useful questions to ask [10:13]
- Second conversation example, exploring first before pivoting into the context [11:41]
- Second conversation analysis start [19:11]
- The feeling that exploratory conversation creates [19:34]
- Finding opportunities for mutual value exchange [20:00]
- Connecting the dots between the exploratory conversation and the specific context [20:41]
- How the ‘hard pivot’ impacted the conversation [21:11]
- How worrying about time changes the energy of a conversation [22:00]
- The importance of thinking about the conversation as the first of many [22:34]
- What makes these types conversations boring and draining [23:50]
- Weaving information we’ve learned about the other person into the conversation [24:49]
- Third conversation example, meandering from exploratory conversation to context [25:54]
- Third conversation analysis start [34:16]
- Getting the other person to tell a story that answers some of your questions [35:01]
- Moving from story to concept rather than the other way around [35:34]
- How you do something is how you do everything [36:23]
- Landing on a way to exchange value [37:30]
- Sharing the motivations and challenging the brief [38:13]
- Episode key takeaways [39:09]